Falling in love with somebody is a beautiful experience… It’s also great and exhilarating and a bit scary.
It has been said that you only fall in love with 3 people in your lifetime. But, it’s also thought that you need each of these loves for a different reason.
The first love
Often your first love is when you are young, in high school even. It’s actually the idealistic and innocent love—the one that seems like a fairy tale. You begin to think that it’ll be your first and your only love. You think that person is unique. You cannot get them out of your head. You daydream about them all the time. You imagine your futures together.
It’s the love that appeals to what you should be doing for the sake of your family and society. You enter into it with the belief that it’ll be your only love and it does not matter if it does not feel quite right, or if you find yourself having to swallow down your personal truths to make it work as deep down you think that it’s what love is meant to be.
In this kind of love, how other people see you is more important than how you really feel.
The second love
When compared to the first type of love, the second love is harder and more complicated. It helps you learn more about yourself than your partner. It enables you to understand “who you are as a person”, “who your partner is,” and “where you want to go in life”. It helps you understand what kind of a person you want to live the rest of your life with.
It’s the type of love that hurts, whether through lies, deceit, manipulation, and pain. You may experience lies, deceit, and manipulation, and may get hurt by your partner. It may get nasty, frustrating, and unhealthy. It may involve drama, and even physical or emotional abuse.
That’s why breakups may follow. You may forgive and make up again and again. It may become a vicious circle that you repeat since you believe that the ending will be different from before.
However, it isn’t and you give up on the relationship entirely. You may end it with heartbreak and tears in your eyes, but it can make you stronger.
The third love
It’s the kind of love you never see coming. It comes in time when you least expect it. It’s supposed to catch you off-guard. It’s totally unplanned and arrives out of the blue. It looks all wrong for you and destroys any lingering ideals you clung to about what love is meant to be.
It comes so easy that it seems impossible. It’s the type of love where the connection cannot be explained and knocks you off your feet as you never planned for it.
It’s the kind of love where you come together with somebody and it just fits—there’re not any perfect expectations about how they should be acting.
You accept each other for who you are, and it shakes you to your core. It still shatters your preconceived notions and shows you that love does not have to be how you thought in order to be true.
It still continues to knock on your door, regardless of how long it takes for you to answer. It just feels right. And it makes you feel like the best version of yourself.
Article by Optimal Positivity